I was in Toronto last week. There, among several other engagements, I had the pleasure to work with a group of engineering students who are part of the Institute for Leadership Education at the University of Toronto. This year they’re participating in “The Game,” working in teams to design an initiative to change the world,. We worked on developing “team consciousness,” the challenges of innovating collaboratively, the importance of freedom and empowerment, and productively managing difference and conflict. (Click here to read what one of the students wrote about it.)
I loved working with them. Walking away from our workshop I was struck by how refreshing it was to lead a different age group, a group comprised of students ranging from approximately 18–22 years old. On the heels of that experience, I went on to teach the last of four modules of my Deep Democracy year-long training. There, our wonderful group (whom I’ll miss sorely!) had a big age span, including many young leaders and facilitators who would be, technically “Millennials.”
This has all got me thinking. I’m lucky to know and work with several Millennials: i.e. young adults born after 1980. While it’s easy to veer off into sweeping generalizations and stereotypes of generations (just as it is to do so for any demographic difference), I’m struck by how much I’m learning from my Millennial friends, colleagues and students. For instance
1. They’re not afraid to ask for help. I never realized it until now, but generational conflict was a specialty of my generation, the Baby Boomers, and not necessarily a part of every generation’s experience. When I was a young adult, it was not just uncool to ask your parents for help, it was considered pointless. How could anyone ever understand the unique struggles we young people faced?
My generation practically trademarked experiential learning. We had to discover and rediscover everything for ourselves. That mindset sticks with me today: It often feels unnatural and counterintuitive to ask for help or seek mentors. And yet, my younger colleagues have no such hesitation. They proudly talk about their mentors, and eagerly ask for advice. And they appreciate the answers.
For me, that speaks to their self-esteem. Whereas I as a young person felt threatened by being told what to do, they seem very comfortable receiving advice, then tailoring it to suit their needs, picking and choosing to apply what works best
2. They just put it out there. I’m steeped in the perfectionist concept: start with a rough draft, move onto the second draft, then the final draft, then proofread, get feedback, and revise; then, only when everything is completely buttoned down, and ship-shape, is it considered done.
But that’s not how Millenials operate. Their generation grew up beta. Ship before ready, just try stuff, test it out, iterate, and try again. It’s incredibly relieving and refreshing. Though I must admit, I still wobble needlessly before hitting send. I’m better than I was, in large part thanks to Matt Lurie, my social media consultant and coach. Though he is super patient, I’m sure I am still moving at a glacial pace when it comes to getting it out there.
3. They’re driven by purpose, but it has to be fun. My Millennial friends and colleagues place a huge value on purpose: there has to be relevance attached to their work, there has to be a larger reason to do things. Often, that purpose involves the “triple bottom line” in some way: people and planet, as well as profit. But Millennials are not just highly motivated to do good things, but to do things differently, to make a change, and to have fun. It has to be fun, or why do it? That’s something I hear a lot from my Millennial colleagues.
Now, you could say my generation was motivated by that too. Certainly, our social activism was all about purpose, and we were very driven to do things differently. But I’m not sure fun was such a driving force. Social change, anger at the status quo, and the desire to make our voices count, those were drivers. And if we had some fun along the way, that was also good.
The other day I heard a report on NPR that Bob Dylan is on the cover of the next issue of AARP magazine. As radio host Scott Simon asked, “How does it feel?” How short-sighted my generation was when we said “never trust anyone over thirty.” Did we think we’d never age?
I have aged. And I can sense a palpable cultural difference when I talk with a twentysomething. But I grapple with whether or not there really are differences between generations, or is it just another permutation of an age-old schism between the young and the… not so young, or even more, the mind-sets of young and old. And that, perhaps, the gap is a manufactured one. Because the truth is, young is a state of mind. As is old. And each of us, no matter how young or old, has an equal opportunity to be present and unafraid, to take risks and find purpose.
And this is why this song is such a timeless one:
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